Teacher World

A new state law in New Jersey to curb bullying in their schools is being called the toughest legislation against bullying in the nation, and it’s receiving both support and apprehension.

The new law, called the Anti-Bullying Bill of Rights was motivated by public uproar over the suicide of Rutgers University freshman, Tyler Clementi, almost a year ago. It requires all public schools to adopt comprehensive anti-bullying policies (there are 18 pages of “required components”) to increase staff training, and to comply with strict deadlines for reporting episodes.

Each school is required to designate an anti-bullying specialist, whose job it is to investigate all complaints of bullying in their school, and each district must appoint an anti-bullying coordinator. Additionally, every effort made by districts will be evaluated by the State Education Department, which will post grades on its website. According to superintendents in the state, educators who refuse to comply could lose their licenses.

While many parents and educators are more than willing to do what is necessary to control bullying both in schools and online, some school board members and superintendents across the state claim that this law, which is slated to take effect tomorrow, goes way too far. They also complain that they have not been given the additional resources it will take to meet the demands this law will place on their schools.

Richard G. Bozza, executive director of the New Jersey Association of School Administrators said, “I think this has gone well overboard. Now we have to police the community 24 hours a day. Where are the people and the resources to do this?”

In general, schools are using their guidance counselors and social workers to take on the role of anti-bullying specialists. While this may seem like the best alternative, it raises concerns as to whether they have either the time or experience to investigate every complaint of harassment or intimidation as well as filling out the detailed reports that are required, all the while fulfilling all their usual job-related obligations.

An additional concern of some administrators is whether making the schools legally responsible for bullying both in and out of school will make them more vulnerable to complaints and possible lawsuits when students and parents are not satisfied with the outcome of their investigations.

To prepare for the implementing of this law, thousands of school employees spent part of their summer attending training sessions, and more than 200 districts purchased a package compiled by a consulting firm that includes a 100-page manual and a DVD. Cost of the package? $1,295!

Some of those who attended left feeling, like Meg Duffy, a little overwhelmed with the mandates of this new law. A counselor at the Hillside Intermediate School in Bridgewater, she said that there had been an increase in cyberbullying at her school last year, with students texting and/or posting mean comments about other students. These are the kinds of situations this new bill would demand that schools get involved with as well as bullying at school.

Districts are also required under this law to appoint a safety team including teachers, other staff members, and parents at each school. Their job would be to review complaints. It also requires principals to begin investigations of reports of bullying within one school day of the bullying episode. Superintendents need to provide reports to Trenton two times a year which contains details of all of the bullying episodes their district deals with each year.

One district that is taking this law very seriously is the East Hanover district. They have partnered with Crimestoppers, a program of the Morris County sheriff’s office, with the intent of making the reporting of bullying easier. But the fact that Crimestoppers will accept anonymous text messages, calls, or tips to its website is a little frightening. These anonymous tips will be forwarded to schools and local police officials.

This district is spending $3,000 to train its staff, including coaches, cafeteria workers, custodians, and substitute teachers. Joseph L. Ricca, the district’s superintendent, said, “We really want to be able to implement this new law and achieve results.” But he added, that the law’s “sheer scope may prove to be a bit unwieldy and may require some practical refinement.”

 “The whole push is to incorporate the anti-bullying process into the culture,” Lucila Hernandez, a school psychologist, said. “We’re empowering children to use the term ‘bullying’ and to speak up for themselves and for others.”

At North Hunterdon High School, students will be learning that if they see bullying, they have a responsibility to try to stop it because there is no such thing as an innocent bystander.

Dr. Margaret Dolan, the Westfield superintendent expressed concern that, due to this new law, both parents and students may find it easier to call minor disagreements bullying, instead of trying to find ways to work out their differences. 

 “Kids have to learn to deal with conflict,” she said. “What a shame if they don’t know how to effectively interact with their peers when they have a disagreement.”

Now, I must admit, as much as I advocate developing stronger anti-bullying policies in our schools, this law seems so big and so unmanageable that I fear it is going to create chaos. There is simply no way that every single reported incident of bullying is going to be handled within a day by already overworked principals, and that superintendents will be able to find the time to fill out the detailed reports on every incident that is investigated. These expectations are unreasonable when no additional resources are being provided.

The other huge problem I see with this law is the reporting, just as Dr. Dolan said, of every frivolous disagreement between students, which would further inundate the specialists and principals in an avalanche of reports to be investigated, making it difficult or impossible to get to the serious incidents of bullying that really do require intervention.

Finally, the idea of taking anonymous tips is extremely problematic. I am sure that some kids will use this opportunity as it is intended; to report incidents of bullying that they would be afraid to admit to publicly. But you can’t tell me that some wouldn’t view this as the perfect opportunity to get back at someone they harbor a grudge against by calling in a bogus tip just to get that person in trouble, or maybe even to take the spotlight off of their own bullying.

I am all for tougher anti-bullying policies in our schools, and I believe the intent of this law is commendable. I just fear that it is such an overwhelming venture that the likelihood of its success is bleak. I would hope that, if it does prove to be too wide in its scope, future revisions might make it more manageable and more successful.

Good luck New Jersey! I would not be upset if you prove me wrong!

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Just a quick update tonight on the Tyler Clementi case as it pertains to Dharun Ravi, Tyler’s former roommate at Rutgers University.

I’m sure you all remember reading and hearing about the tragic suicide of Tyler Clementi this past September shortly after his roommate, Dharun Ravi, and Molly Wei, allegedly videoed a romantic encounter Tyler had with another man in his dorm room and streamed it online for others to see.

I have reported already in a previous blog, that Molly Wei appeared in court earlier this month where she pled not guilty in two counts of invasion of privacy for watching the video with Ravi. Per court orders, Wei must complete a three-year counseling program on cyber bullying as well as alternate and cultural lifestyles. She must also complete 300 hours of community service.  Included in her plea deal was her agreement to testify against Ravi. If she completes the counseling and community service without further legal problems, the invasion of privacy charges will be dropped from her record.

So, that leaves us with Dharun Ravi whose attorneys entered a not guilty plea today on behalf of their client. No surprise there, right? He is charged with streaming the video of this physical relationship which, according to prosecutors, was allegedly accessed from another room and then advertised on Twitter, making this private encounter, without Tyler’s knowledge, publicly available to others.

Ravi is facing a 15-count indictment of hate crime charges involving invasion of privacy and evidence tampering. Prosecutors claim that after the incident (I’m sure when Ravi realized what kind of trouble he was in) he tried to cover up his actions by deleting a previous Twitter post, replacing it with one he hoped would mislead investigators. Additionally, prosecutors claim that he asked witnesses not to testify against him.

The tragic suicide of Tyler Clementi has sparked grave concern for young people like Tyler who face bullying on school campuses leading to an increase in anti-bullying sentiment all across our nation. It sparked President Obama less than a month after his death to condemn what had transpired at Rutgers University and to say to others like Tyler, “You are not alone. You did not do anything wrong. You didn’t do anything to deserve being bullied and there is a whole world waiting for you filled with possibilities.”

And it prompted the proposed federal anti-harassment legislation called the “Tyler Clementi Higher Education Anti-Harassment Act.” If this law is passed, it would require any school that receives federal student aid to develop policies which would prohibit the harassment of any student on a school campus.

In the meantime, I will continue to update you regarding Dharun Ravi’s case. I can only hope the courts remember the family of Tyler Clementi before agreeing to any deals which keep Ravi from facing up to the consequences of his misguided and bigoted actions. A slap on the wrist this time would be criminal! 

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Is it me, or is the month of May turning into bullying-plea-bargain season? Just when I think I’ve covered every plea bargain out there, here’s one more, this time from Trenton, New Jersey.

You remember the case from Rutgers University involving the video taping of Tyler Clementi in an encounter with another boy by his roommate, Dharun Ravi who was aided by Molly Wei. The video was posted online for others to see leading to Tyler’s apparent suicidal jump off the George Washington Bridge.

This past Friday, Molly Wei pleaded not guilty to two counts of invasion of privacy. The deal she accepted requires she be admitted into a three-year pretrial intervention program. If she completes that program without additional legal troubles, the two invasion of privacy charges, which she received for allegedly watching the video with Tyler, will be dropped, according to a statement from the Middlesex County Prosecutor’s Office.

But, that’s not all! Wei will also have to complete 300 hours of community service, participate in counseling which centers on cyber bullying and alternate and cultural lifestyles, and (and this is a biggie) she must testify against Ravi.

According to authorities, Ravi was the one who placed the camera in the room without Tyler’s knowledge and accessed it remotely. Then, according to Middlesex County Prosecutor Bruce J. Kaplan, he “provided others an opportunity to view the encounter.”

As if this wasn’t bad enough, Ravi tried to view a second encounter between Tyler and the same male two days later. He then alerted others on Twitter of the planned meeting. Then, according to the statement, he deleted the tweet, replacing it with a false one in order to mislead investigators.

Ravi has been indicted by a grand jury on 15 counts which include invasion of privacy, bias intimidation, tampering with physical evidence, witness tampering, and hindering apprehension of prosecution. He is to be arraigned on May 23.

Wei remained silent after the brief hearing, but her lawyer claimed that she isn’t a bully and has been cooperative with both the investigation and the prosecutor’s office.

In the meantime, Tyler’s father, Joe, read a statement outside the courtroom in which he said that the charges were a direct result of Wei’s “bad decisions without regard for another person’s privacy or dignity. … We are here to say that we are committed to do what we can to reinforce calls for compassion and respect for human dignity that have been made in response to Tyler’s experience…”

“Actions have consequences,” he concluded. “We hope Ms. Wei will become a better person and show kindness to people.”

I reported earlier today regarding the plea agreements in the Phoebe Prince case. As I compare these two situations, I must applaud the judge of this West Windsor, New Jersey court, and anyone else who helped draft this agreement, for a job well-done. This, as far as I am concerned, is a much more appropriate plea agreement; one that better fits the crime.

The extended length of time, three years rather than just one or less than one year, seems fairer. And I think it is awesome that during this time she will do 300 not just 100 hours of community service. This service will take time, it will be inconvenient, and it will be a constant reminder to her of what she did and what she must never do again.

And why wasn’t counseling a criteria in the Prince pleas? How appropriate that Wei will be a captive audience as she explores the difference between insensitivity and compassion for people who face cyber bullying or who live an alternative lifestyle.

Molly has been offered the chance of a lifetime; the chance to learn from her mistakes, to be a better, more sensitive person who accepts others even when they are different from her.

This agreement lends itself to true restitution and rehabilitation. I commend this court for coming up with a set of firm, yet fair, requirements which, if followed, will strengthen this girl’s spirit rather than crush it.

Good luck to you, Molly Wei. Use this time wisely, for your sake and for Tyler’s.

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I recently wrote a blog about Billy Lucas, the 15-year old Greensburg High School student who took his life after months of relentless bullying from students who assumed he was gay. There was a reason for my writing about an incident that occurred last September.

I want to tell you about a wonderful message of hope that sprang from this tragedy; I want you to listen to Dan Savage, if you haven’t already done so. This is a truly inspirational plea to teens like Billy who face bullying due to their actual or perceived sexual orientation.

Dan Savage is the creator of a syndicated sex-advice column called “Savage Love”. After reading about Billy Lucas, Savage said he wished he could have had five minutes to talk to him before he made his fateful decision to end his life. He wished he could have told him “however bad things were, however isolated and alone he was, it gets better.”

That’s when he decided, although it was too late to help Billy Lucas, it was not too late to talk to the millions of kids who were growing up just like him; those kids who were dealing with harassment and bullying because of their real or perceived sexual orientation. He and his husband, Terry Miller, posted a video in which they talked about the issues they faced as teenagers because they were gay. They addressed the bullying and harassment they faced especially in high school and admitted that it was a horrible time in their lives.

But the real message of their video was that they not only got through it but have a wonderful life, surrounded by family and friends who support them. They talked about their favorite memories and the joy they have shared through the adoption of their son. They spoke of hope and living life fully. But most of all, the message that resonated throughout their video was: “Hang in there. You will get through high school, and things will get better.”

“When a gay teenager commits suicide, it’s because he can’t picture a life for himself that’s filled with joy and family and pleasure and is worth sticking around for,” Savage said. “So I felt it was really important that, as gay adults, we show them that our lives are good and happy and healthy and that there’s a life worth sticking around for after high school.”

This simple video was the birth of a wonderful project which has been embraced by other gay, bisexual, and transgender adults. The goal of the It Gets Better Project is to show youth who face bullying of any kind, but specifically bullying due to their sexual orientation, that life does get better. The goal is to encourage and fortify them so that they get through the rough years in order to enjoy the better years to come.

Their project received national coverage after the apparent suicide of 18-year old Tyler Clementi, the Rutgers University student who committed suicide after his roommate and a friend posted a video of him in a sexual encounter with another man.

This time, Savage lamented that the videos were too late for Tyler. “Anybody whose privacy was invaded the way Tyler Clementi’s privacy was invaded would’ve been outraged, humiliated and embarrassed and angry, but we have to ask ourselves: What pushed him to suicide?” Savage said. “I believe that this video invasion of his privacy, this streaming of this intimate, private moment, this outing was the last straw. And I suspect that Tyler Clementi, as we find out more about him, we’ll find that he was a victim of bullying in high school, bullying in middle school … It’s really hard to look at this suicide and not see, perhaps, the culmination of years and years of abuse, and a moment — for Tyler Clementi — of despair.”

After the Clementi case, the It Gets Better Project was literally flooded with videos from all over the world submitted by LGBT individuals who wanted to share their stories as well. And while their messages of hope have been truly inspirational, Savage worried that once media focus shifted to something else, people would forget that there were so many other young people facing the same abusive behavior all over the world. Therefore, he has promised to continue sending positive messages to young people through It Gets Better as long as possible.

“It’s been so overwhelming, [and] we want to create an archive that lives online forever, for each generation of gay kids coming up, so they can go there and they can see these stories,” Savage said. “I’m hearing from mothers of bullied gay teenagers who are sitting down to watch these videos together and taking such hope for their futures, and that’s what I want to see. I want to see the people who need to see these videos finding their way to them. Not just today or tomorrow, but whenever.”

I know that these videos have been around for awhile, and some of you have probably already viewed a few of them. But, if you haven’t seen them yet, I encourage you, whether you are lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, straight, bullied, not bullied, or a bully yourself, to watch them. They are beautiful messages of hope at a time when so many young people need to hear words that will give them the courage to continue on.

Click on these links to hear President Obama, Adam Lambert, and Glee’s Max Adler’s videos on It Gets Better. Explore some more on your own, and if you know a young person who needs to hear words like these to encourage and strengthen them to hang in, please pass the message on as well as the website.

We must teach children that suicide is not the answer; it does get better!

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Seven months after Tyler Clementi allegedly committed suicide after his roommate, Dharun Ravi, and fellow student, Molly Wei, taped and posted on the Internet his sexual encounter with another student, there is finally some news regarding Ravi’s possible fate.

Dharun Ravi, a 19-year old former Rutgers University freshman, was indicted this past Wednesday in Middlesex County on 15 counts, which include bias intimidation and invasion of privacy in regard to the events which preceded Tyler Clementi’s suicide on September 22 of last year. Ravi and Wei had already faced invasion of privacy charges but it took months for prosecutors to present their case to a grand jury. Their case alleges that Ravi targeted his roommate due to his sexual orientation and posted the encounter online on September 19 in order to intimidate him.

A statement from county prosecutors read, “Under state law, bias is charged a degree higher than the underlying crime, in this case, invasion of privacy. The defendant has also been charged with two counts of second-degree bias and two counts of third-degree bias. A second-degree offense carries a prison exposure of five to 10 years.”

Ravi was additionally charged with three counts of tampering with evidence, three counts of hindering his own apprehension, and a single count of witness tampering. Prosecutor Bruce Kaplan said that the grand jurors determined that Ravi attempted to mislead investigators and witnesses in a variety of ways. They determined that Ravi deleted a post on Twitter alerting students to watch Clementi’s encounter with another man online.

“The grand jury indictment spells out cold and calculated acts against our son Tyler by his former college roommate. We are eager to have the process move forward for justice in this case and to reinforce the standards of acceptable conduct in our society,” said Joseph and Jane Clementi, in a statement issued by their attorney.

In the United States, grand juries meet privately and issue indictments if probable cause exists, but criminal trial juries must then find guilt beyond a reasonable doubt in order to convict.

Meanwhile, Molly Wei’s case has not been presented to the grand jury at this time. It was uncertain on Wednesday, whether her case would go before the grand jury or whether she had helped prosecutors in an effort to lessen her sentence.

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Here’s a quick update on the Tyler Clementi story. According to a recent CBS News story, Tyler’s parents have filed notice that they intend to sue the school.

You remember the story: Tyler’s roommate, Dharun Ravi, and a friend of Ravi’s, Molly Wei, have been accused of posting a video that was shot from Dharun’s webcam of Tyler in his dorm room with another man. It is believed that Tyler’s apparent suicide just a few days later is at least partially attributed to the harassment he went through at Rutgers University at the hands of these two students.

In situations like this, parents have 90 days to decide if they wish to file a notice of intent to sue. After filing this notice, they have an additional six months to decide if they will indeed file a lawsuit. As of the writing of this CBS article, Joseph and Jane Clementi are still trying to make that decision. In the notice filed by Tyler’s parents, they said, “It appears Rutgers University failed to act, failed to put in place and/or failed to implement, and enforce policies and practices that would have prevented or deterred such acts, and that Rutgers failed to act timely and appropriately”.

Now, this is going to be an interesting case because, to my knowledge, this would be the first college or university to be sued for allowing bullying to take place. While I feel strongly for these parents and for their loss, I don’t know how fair it is to sue universities for situations such as this. It is one thing to endeavor to control students’ actions in the school environment. Teachers and administrators have a responsibility to protect their students and create a safe environment for learning. But how do you control how students treat each other in the privacy of their dormitories? Especially now with the use of technology? Is it possible for administrators to control the hundreds or thousands of students on campus when they are out of the classroom? Certainly rules need to be in place and the students or adults who are paid to help monitor dorm activity need to responsibly work to insure that these rules are being followed or report infractions when they are not. But how could anyone have foreseen what took place in Tyler’s room and stopped that atrocity from happening?

If Tyler’s parents decide to sue, it seems to me that it will be difficult to prove negligence on the part of Rutgers University unless there had been several previous occurrences which were brought to the attention of the University and ignored. I haven’t read of any such incidents in any of the articles I have followed from this case. And they would have to prove that somehow the university was negligent in protecting Tyler. Unless they had previous knowledge that Tyler was being harassed by these two students, how could such negligence be proven? How do colleges control student behavior at all times in dormitories? My college certainly didn’t, and I would hazard a guess that it is impossible to do so without invading students’ privacy, which will get colleges in trouble, too. What a mess!

I will keep you informed as more details come out. I imagine colleges everywhere are watching this case with baited breath.

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This will be my last blog on the subject of Tyler Clementi until more news breaks regarding Dharun Ravi and Molly Wei. I mentioned in a previous blog that one of the repercussions of Tyler’s apparent suicide is the fear of copycat suicides. Let’s explore what this means.

Since Tyler’s apparent suicide, according to the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention, there have been at least six suicides of young people who were either gay or tormented for being gay. One of these was a teenager from Pennsylvania who stepped in front of a tractor-trailer after leaving behind a note saying he was tired of being called “faggot” and “sissy” and he wanted to make people aware of the problem of bullying. The fear is that these suicides may have been spurred by Tyler’s tragic story.

Therefore, the dilemma is how does the media report on these tragedies, which of course they must, without inadvertently romanticizing or even encouraging other teenagers who are unstable to follow a similar path. Experts say that some youth who are struggling with comparable issues may feel that the suicide of someone like Tyler Clementi gives them the attention and sympathy which they never got in life. This makes the suicide appear glamorous to them. Other youth might begin to debate the fact that if someone like Tyler couldn’t make it, they can’t either. A youth who is struggling with mental illness may even consider this to be a reasonable option because it stops the pain.

The Internet has increased the likelihood of these kinds of responses. In an age when people are able to read news from all over the world with a simple click of the computer, phone, or Ipad, it becomes impossible to pinpoint whether a suicide is directly related to a news report because news no longer has geographical boundaries. Ann Haas, the director of prevention programs at the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention said that Clementi’s story reached farther than most suicide stories do. Additionally, as reported by Geoff Mulvihill and Meghan Barr at Associated Press: “Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender youth are more likely to attempt suicide than their straight counterparts. And bullied youths are more likely to try suicide than those who aren’t.” The spokeswoman for The Trevor Project, which provides a hot line specifically aimed at crisis intervention and suicide prevention for gay youths, reported that their hot line handled about 75 percent more calls than usual after Clementi’s death.

So what advice do those who deal with teen suicide have for the media to encourage responsible reporting of these events? Primarily, they ask that the media refrain from stating or concluding that the suicide was the result of one factor or event. They emphasize that most people who kill themselves are suffering from depression or are struggling with other mental health issues. Responsible reporting then should include statements of these pre-existing conditions that were contributing factors to the suicide. If more responsible reporting by the media could help reduce the number of copycat suicides, then this should clearly be their goal in the future as they report on stories similar to Tyler’s.

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Do you appreciate the ironic? Well, here is the tragically ironic follow-up of the Tyler Clementi blogs. It couldn’t have been scripted better in a movie than the way it played out in real life. Here goes!

The tragic news of Tyler Clementi’s apparent suicide came out on the same day that Rutgers University, the university he attended, launched “Project Civility”,  a campus-wide, two-year project “to teach the importance of civility, with special attention to the use and abuse of new technology”, as reported by The New York Times. After the initial event that spearheaded “Project Civility”, almost 100 demonstrators gathered at the site of the university president’s speech and chanted, “Civility without safety — over our queer bodies!”

In spite of the obvious irony of the timing of this event, clearly this university is attempting to be proactive and deal directly with a serious issue, and we should commend them for their efforts. The project, which “will involve panel discussions, lectures, workshops and other events to raise awareness about the importance of respect, compassion and courtesy in everyday interactions”, is a worthy venture which I hope will be widely attended. Additionally, workshops were scheduled for students and administrators on residential life on campus, and a panel discussion, “Uncivil Gadgets? Changing Technologies and Civil Behavior” was also in place. Timely, or what?

Now, as far as I see it, there are two ways to look at the timeliness or untimeliness of this campaign which followed so closely on the heels of Tyler Clementi’s death. The pessimists out there might consider this attempt on the university’s part to create a more civil climate on campus as a waste of time, especially in light of this recent tragedy. Their attitude would mirror many who say that bullying has always been a part of the fabric of our society, and no amount of discussing, debating, or developing policies to deal with bullying will be successful, so why try? There is within all of us a little voice that tells us that this may be so.

But, lucky for us, there are optimistic fighters out there who are unwilling to accept the inevitability of bullying. They struggle to force this issue into the limelight and attack it head-on because they refuse to accept the tragic ramifications of bullying which we have seen so much of in recent years. The administration and faculty of Rutgers University should be commended for being in this group. In the kickoff ceremonies for “Project Civility”, the university’s president, Richard L. McCormick boldly stated the following: “It is more clear than ever that we need strongly to reassert our call for civility and responsibility for each other.”

Hat’s off to you, Rutgers University, and to all those who, like you, refuse to believe that bullying and harassment are here to stay! Thank you, in spite of your own tragic losses this fall, for boldly making a stand and fighting for civility and respect. And may we all take a lesson from you, and launch our own bold campaigns in our own spheres of influence to rise up and refuse to accept bullying, in or out of the classroom!

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My first follow-up of the Tyler Clementi blog posted this weekend deals with the two young people whose poor judgment and malicious bullying were indirectly responsible for this young man’s apparent suicide. If you recall, Dharun Ravi, Tyler’s roommate, was allegedly responsible for using the webcam on his computer to tape a private moment Tyler had with a man. Then, he and Molly Wei allegedly streamed this intimate video on the Internet for other students to see. So what has happened to these two Rutgers students and how have their precipitous actions affected their lives? That is the subject of this blog.

First, Dharun Ravi and Molly Wei, both residents of New Jersey, have each been charged with two counts of invasion of privacy for using a camera to view and then transmit live images of Tyler during this intimate encounter. They face the possibility of up to five years in prison which is the maximum sentence if found guilty. Additionally, Dharun faces two more counts of invasion of privacy for trying to send a similar live feed on the Internet the day before Tyler’s suicide on September 21.

The investigation is ongoing and could possibly involve additional charges. Some people are going so far is to call the death of Tyler Clementi a result of a hate crime. Steven Goldstein, chairman of Garden State Equality, a gay rights group, made the following statement about Ravi and Wei’s actions: “We are sickened that anyone in our society, such as the students allegedly responsible for making the surreptitious video, might consider destroying others’ lives as a sport,”

Molly Wei was released on her own recognizance, and Dharun Ravi was freed on bail. And what has happened to their lives since then? Apparently they both faced some major repercussions for their actions, to the extent that they were “shunned and vilified”. They also faced disciplinary action if they had stayed at Rutgers. Therefore, Ravi transferred to another school, and according to Molly’s lawyer, she quit out of fear for her own life. She is studying to take her SAT’s again in order to go back to school at some future time.

Now, here is the sad truth. These two people made a terrible decision meant to humiliate and publicly destroy another person. No one with an ounce of decency would treat another human being in such a devastatingly hateful manner. Whether this was a hate crime or not, it has certainly been about hate. Either they hated Tyler, hated what he was doing, or have no respect for other people’s privacy as long as they get a laugh. Are they really surprised that they are being “shunned and vilified”? Hate tends to beget hate. That old adage comes to mind that you reap what you sow. I surmise that it isn’t so funny to them now, and I would hazard a guess that if given the same opportunity now, their actions would be very different.

So, two more lives have forever been altered due to this tragic incident. The difference is that Tyler’s life is over, but Ravi and Wei’s futures still hang in the balance. I can only hope that they use this tragedy to grow, to take responsibility for their actions, and to learn from their terrible mistakes. Moving on, even if they do not go to prison, will not be easy for these two.

May this tragic event and it’s equally tragic repercussions send a strong message to our young people to stop using the Internet to bully and harass others.

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I’m sure you all remember September’s sad news reports about Tyler Clementi, his roommate’s betrayal, and Tyler’s resultant suicide. Such a terrible loss in and of itself, but apparently, a rash of teenage suicides are being linked to this case, so I am going to revisit Tyler’s sad story in this blog and will talk about the national ramifications of his suicide in a future one.

What happened to Tyler is one of the most brutal forms of high-tech bullying I have ever heard about. On September 19, Tyler Clementi, a quiet, shy Rutgers University student with a love for and a talent for violin, was videoed by his roommate in the privacy of Tyler’s room as he engaged in an intimate moment with another male. Allegedly, Dharun Ravi, Tyler’s roommate, used a webcam on his computer to make the video and then posted a message on his Twitter account telling his friends what he had seen. Although Ravi and Molly Wei, another student accused of involvement in Tyler’s harassment, claim they only watched the video for a few minutes in private, they are being accused of streaming the video on the internet for their friends to view as well. Ravi is also being accused of trying a similar live feed on the Internet on September 21, the day before the suicide.

Whatever the extent of the cyber bullying, the effect was tragic as only three days after the original internet posting, Clementi wrote the following note on his Facebook page: “Jumping off the gw bridge sorry.” And that is exactly what he did! On September 22, Tyler Clementi jumped from the George Washington Bridge into the Hudson River in an apparent suicide. A life lost due to on-line bullying by two misguided teenagers who decided that they had the right to tell the world something Tyler wasn’t ready for the world to know in the most humiliating way possible. How sad that these young people felt the need to judge someone who had never hurt them out of some misguided sense of power! And three lives have been forever altered due to ignorance and intolerance.

But it doesn’t end here. And that is the topic of a future blog…

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