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Cyberbaiting is Rising Among Kids According to Norton Report

November 26th, 2011

Recent information from the Norton Online Family Report, which looks at the effects of growing up in a digital age on young people, revealed a rather sobering trend in schools which can be very harmful to teachers. It is called cyberbaiting, a phenomenon, according to the report, that twenty-one percent of teachers have either personally experienced or know of another teacher who has experienced it.

This study from Symantec included interviews from kids and their parents from 24 countries including the United States which revealed some interesting statistics. For example, it found that 62 percent of kids (more than six in ten) said they have had a negative experience while they have been online such as being bullied, downloading a virus, responding to an email scam, or being pressured to do something online that they thought was wrong.

Symantec also found that 82 percent of kids who broke their “Internet house rules” experienced something negative online, compared to 52 percent of kids who “follow house rules.” Additionally, it found that 95 percent of parents know what their children are viewing online.

But the most troubling news for teachers was the report’s findings on cyberbaiting. What is cyberbaiting? Symantec Internet Safety Advocate Marian Merritt describes it as a situation in which students deliberately provoke a teacher into doing something that is out of control and stupid. Someone tapes the teacher going off on their cell phone, and the destructive video is posted online.

“This of course has the net effect of embarrassing the teacher, taking a momentary lapse of judgment in a classroom and embedding it onto the web,” Merritt explained.

I became curious after reading about cyberbaiting, as this was the first I had heard of this phenomenon. (Obviously I am not in the 21 percent from the report.) I decided to launch some Google searches trying to find some reported incidents of cyberbaiting. But my attempts came up empty; I found nothing. In fact, it was as though the internet had no idea what I was asking for.

But in a podcast interview with Marian Merritt, she said that she had Googled “teachers lose it” and discovered a multitude of posted videos which were derogatory to teachers. So, I tried it myself, and like Merritt, I was astounded at the plethora of awful videos out there.

The report further found that because of the widespread prevalence of cyberbaiting, 67 percent of teachers reported that they felt it was too risky to friend students on social networks, although 34 percent continue to friend their students. Additionally, about 51 percent of those interviewed said that their schools have social media codes of conduct which control how students and teachers can interact with each other online.

It should come as no surprise that 80 percent of teachers feel that there should be more education provided in school regarding online safety, and 70 percent of parents agree.

Merritt warned against becoming fixated on the findings that 21 percent of teachers said they had “experienced or know another teacher who’s experienced cyberbaiting.” In her interview, she said that it is likely that a very small number of teachers have actually experienced cyberbaiting themselves. However, she acknowledges that even though the numbers are low, the findings do indicate that it is an issue.

So, I’m curious. Have any of you experienced cyberbaiting? Drop us a line if you or someone you know was the victim of cyberbaiting.

Bullying, Teacher-World's Blog , , , ,

When Should Parents Get Involved

October 19th, 2011

CNN recently did an article on when parents should get involved in their children’s problems. This is what their expert advice is on some common situations children, and their parents face. I found the ones that deal with school issues to be very well-stated and would love to pass this advice along to all of your parents out there who wonder, “Should I intervene, or not?”

The first topic they wrote about is should you get involved if your child has an unreasonable amount of homework to do. Jan Busey, an elementary teacher from Asheville, North Carolina advised that parents first make sure that their child is actually working when they are supposed to rather than playing with a pet or daydreaming.

She said that if they find that they are honestly doing their job but are still overwhelmed, they should make an appointment with their child’s teacher, but to come prepared. “Set goals for your child to complete an assignment, then assess at the end of that time,” says Busey. “And write down specific challenges. The more you can show that you’ve tried to deal with the issue at home, the more receptive a teacher will be to your concerns.”

She also suggests that if the child is improving with the structure you have created, you probably don’t need to meet with the teacher; just continue doing what you’re doing.

Next, should you get involved when another child is bullying your child on the playground? Stacy DeBroff, author of The Mom Book, recommends that you don’t get involved right away, unless you are afraid that your child is not safe. Instead, DeBroff says, “If you’re there, watch closely and give your child a chance to solve the problem on her own.”

But, what about bullying that occurs on the school playground? She recommends the same approach, saying that it’s better to equip your child with the skills he needs to stay safe, empowering him with the determination to handle the situation on his own.

DeBroff suggests that parents rehearse appropriate responses to the bullying with their child. So, if your child has a sense of humor, responding in humor might be her best option, or, if a more assertive response is appropriate, have her practice a strong “Cut it out” then have her walk away.

Michele Borba, an educational psychologist from Palm Springs, California, and author of The Big Book of Parenting Solutions, said, “Have her practice standing up straight, chest out, like she’s wearing a bulletproof vest that taunts bounce right off of.”

Reconsider your approach if the bullying continues and your child is feeling threatened. That is when you get involved by calmly removing your child from the playground with a viable excuse, like snack time, rather than trying to talk to her in front of the bully, which will only embarrass her further.

If the bullying is happening at school, contact the teacher and let them know what is happening. From a teacher’s perspective, I will tell you that many times bullying incidents occur when the teacher is not around, and is therefore oblivious to the bullying. So, inform the teacher, and ask them to keep an eye out for further episodes. The article states that most schools take bullying seriously, which is true. Most states, 39 to be exact, have adopted laws addressing bullying, so teachers should know what to do to handle incidents at school.

What do you do when your child’s teacher gave your child a lower grade than he thinks he deserves? Jan Busey recommends that parents should only get involved if their child is willing to take part in the conversation with the teacher. “If you believe your child’s points are valid, say you’ll make an appointment with the teacher but that he’ll have to make the case.”

Now, I love this part; Busey says to leave it up to your child to ask the teacher why she gave him the grade she did. “Hearing the feedback from the teacher will help him fine-tune future assignments,” says Busey. And helping your child to list his reasons for disagreeing with the grade ahead of time teaches him how to approach future disagreements in a constructive manner.

But CNN says (and I strongly agree) to reconsider going in to talk to the teacher if your child commonly misreads or incorrectly copies down instructions, and make sure you have all of the details before jumping to possibly incorrect conclusions. As the article states, “A stellar report on blue whales is less so if the task was to write about smaller mammals of the sea.”

Finally, what do you do when your child learned a not-so-nice word from a classmate? Don’t try to contact the classmate’s mother; it takes more effort than it’s worth. Busey says, “I was actually glad when my children used those words — at home, anyway. It gave me the chance to explain what they mean and how they make other people feel.”

The article recommends that you reconsider if it becomes a regular problem when your child plays with this particular classmate, and he is breaking rules with this classmate regularly. Now it’s time to talk to the parents, but do so with the understanding that they may not even be aware of what is happening themselves. Ask them to keep tabs on what the kids are doing, or have the classmate come to your house where you can see for yourself what is going on.

I concentrated my blog on the aspects of this article that pertained to school, but if you are interested in the rest of the advice that CNN had to offer parents, feel free to follow this link.

I would like to wrap this blog up however, by giving you some examples CNN gave of stories teachers told about just how far meddling parents may go:

–”I had one sixth-grade parent who would e-mail me the night before tests, asking for a copy of the test to ‘help’ her child.”
– “One mother brought her child to school late every Friday so she would conveniently miss the math flash-card tests, which made the girl nervous.”
– “A parent changed the relay order for a swim meet on my computer while I was out coaching. She wanted her kid to swim backstroke, not butterfly.”
– “One father called me after an uninvited child showed up at his daughter’s slumber party, asking me to penalize the student. I told him teachers don’t police slumber parties.”

You sure as heck don’t want to be one of these parents!

Bullying, Teacher-World's Blog , , , , , ,

My Wish List for Teachers in This New School Year

September 1st, 2011

Now that school has started for most districts throughout the United States, and the rest will be starting soon, I thought I’d address all of the teachers out there and express my best wishes to you for a wonderfully satisfying and highly productive school year.

This is my general wish for all of you, but I have some specific hopes and dreams for all of us which I would like to share with you. (Be advised that some of these might be in my list simply to bring a smile to your face.)

In regards to your student population, I wish…
* For your room to be comprised of students who eagerly await every morsel of information you lovingly feed them
* That said students can’t wait to tear into the work you assign for them and always turn their impeccably completed assignments in on time
* That each day begins with a sea of radiant faces and ends with a chorus of grateful goodbyes
* For every eye in the room to routinely focus exactly where you want them to at all times
* That your students learn respect and compassion from your good example and therefore are accepting of each other’s differences and never, ever tease or bully a fellow student
* And that no matter how tired or frustrated you may get, your precious students will know exactly how to make you feel that all of your hard work is worth it.

As far as your students’ parents, I wish…
* That they will trust you to take the best care of their children
* For any communication you have with your students’ parents to always be supportive and positive
* That they will always confer with you first before they automatically assume that their child is telling them the whole story about every given situation that occurs at school
* That occasionally, a parent might surprise you with a card, a grateful email, or maybe even lunch from your favorite local restaurant
* That they are actively involved in their child’s education without giving them all the answers on their homework
* That they understand that academics trump sports

And my wishes for you during the financially challenging times that lay ahead…
* That your pay does not decrease while your contributions for benefits and health care increase
* That your class size does not grow disproportionally to the dimensions of your classroom
* That your position remains permanent in spite of hopefully-temporary district changes
* That your benefits are not cut, and you can still retire when you planned to and not a year or more later
* That we are able to vote down any bills which threaten collective bargaining
* For your districts’ future school levies to pass by a huge majority

And, last but not least, I wish that all of your students pass their state achievement tests this year because we all know that means we are awesome teachers, right?

All kidding aside, we all know we face a precarious future in education. I truly wish you a wonderful year, and would love to hear from you along the way. Let us know how your district is dealing with budget cuts and how your school is holding up. We need to stick together and find comfort in spite of our struggles and share some laughter through each other’s stories.

Here’s to a wonderful 2011-2012 school year!

Teacher-World's Blog , , , ,

How Should Schools Respond to Cyberbullying?

July 20th, 2011

This will be my final blog in the series I have been reporting on regarding cyberbullying. Again, if you haven’t already done so, I would recommend that you go back and read the previous two blogs to get some background for this one which will deal with schools and what they can do to tackle this form of bullying.

I apologize that due to technical difficulties, I was unable to pull up the Cyberbullying Research Center report on what role schools should play to battle cyberbullying. However, I was able to find information from the National Center for Mental Health Promotion and Youth Violence Prevention which I felt would be just as helpful. If you are a teacher, I would encourage you to read the report from the Cyberbullying Research Center on your own as well.

First, it is important to note that this is a difficult form of bullying for schools to deal with since it usually takes place outside of school. Regardless, since cyberbullying has become so prevalent and the affect on its victims can be so devastating, there are actions that experts suggest schools should take to join in the effort to stop cyberbullying.

The first step according to the National Center for Mental Health Promotion and Youth Violence Prevention is to figure out to what degree cyberbullying is an issue in your school or in the district. It suggests surveying students regarding their level of exposure to cyberbullying using input from students, parents, school staff, and computer techs to devise the right survey for your school or district.

The center suggests establishing an anti-cyberbullying task force consisting of the principal, school board attorney, disciplinary officer, and both a parent and student representative to get a fuller understanding of the problem and to develop some anti-cyberbullying proposals.

Through the information obtained from the survey and with the help of the task force, develop an awareness campaign for teachers, school staff, students, parents, and the community at large to talk about what cyberbullying is and its different forms, as well as how it can be stopped or prevented within the authority of the school. Web sites such as Stop Bullying Now! are helpful tools for spreading the word about bullying.

Get kids actively involved in creating a policy which spells out how to appropriately use the school’s technology. The AUP (Acceptable Use Policy) should clearly state what constitutes cyberbullying, prohibit the use of the Internet for bullying, devise strategies for preventing and stopping cyberbullying, and lay out the consequences for violations of the policy. The center recommends that the policy provide consequences for cyberbullying occurring outside of school if it affects the well-being and safety of the victim while they are in school.

Teachers should educate their students to avoid, respond to, and report incidents of cyberbullying. In these discussions, it is important to explain the negative consequences of cyberbullying, which include school discipline, civil litigation, or even criminal prosecution. Students need to learn to refrain from giving out private information and to report any forms of cyberbullying that they either experience or witness firsthand.

Schools need to educate their staff in regards to cyberbullying through professional development and guidance from school counselors. Teachers should all be aware of their school’s AUP and the actions they should take if they suspect cyberbullying is taking place.

Coordinate your school’s efforts with those in the community, and invite local police and law enforcement representatives to come into your classrooms to talk and answer questions about cyberbullying. Even local Internet service providers might be willing to send a representative to explain their company’s regulations against cyberbullying.

Get parents involved by educating them about the forms cyberbullying takes and explain how their children might be affected. Have them sign an AUP along with their child, agreeing that they won’t use the computer to harass others, and ask them to be responsible and watchful at home to insure that their children are using the Internet appropriately. (This was touched on in my blog yesterday.)

The center recommends trying to coordinate consistent cyberbullying prevention education with all other schools in the district from primary to secondary schools.

Finally, the center suggests that your school system reviews state laws related to bullying. They recommend visiting the website, Bully Police USA, for a compilation of state-by-state legislation, and they suggest that you petition state legislatures to add a cyberbullying component to laws that prohibit traditional bullying if your state does not already have that component spelled out.

I’ve taken a significant amount of  time with this subject due to the prevalence of this form of bullying and its destructive results. I plan to spend much of health time at the beginning of this year addressing bullying in an attempt to get the school year started off positively. We will spend a large portion of that time discussing cyberbullying, and I plan to use some of the above suggestions as I create this unit.

Schools need to get much more proactive when it comes to dealing with all forms of bullying, and that means teaching our children that bullying is wrong and will not be tolerated in our schools. Please join me in spreading that message!

Bullying, Teacher-World's Blog , , ,

Was Decision in Providence Attempt to Bust Teachers’ Seniority?

February 27th, 2011

More bad news out of Providence, Rhode Island. As if it wasn’t bad enough to hear the ghastly news that all of Providence’s nearly 2,000 teachers were told that they might be terminated next year, a closer look at the manner in which this terrible situation was handled reveals some potentially grim ulterior motives; the terminating of seniority as well.

Mayor Angel Taveras has stated from the start that his recommendation to terminate all teachers’ contracts was strictly to balance the city and the School Department budgets. He explained that terminating everyone’s contract would save money since “teachers who are dismissed and not rehired will not end up in a substitute teaching pool.”

But according to David V. Abbott, the state’s deputy education commissioner, there is a significant difference between layoffs and dismissals. Under state statute, when a teacher is laid off, they are put on a recall list; they haven’t been dismissed and if a job for which they are qualified becomes available, they are rehired based on seniority. But these teachers were not laid off; they were terminated, which means that every one of them may have to reapply for their job just like any new teacher coming into the school system. Seniority may not factor in at all.

Executive Director of the Rhode Island Association of School Committees Tim Duffy explained that what is further muddying the waters is the fact that this whole situation is “unchartered territory”, leaving questions such as would dismissed teacher get a hearing before losing their jobs, would the district have to state the reasons why each teacher is being terminated, and could teachers appeal their termination?

As if the situation isn’t messy enough, Providence recently altered their policy regarding how vacancies would be filled; starting last fall, filling vacancies is no longer based solely on seniority. According to the new policy, teachers must be interviewed by the principal and a team of colleagues, and they must turn in a model lesson plan as well as a writing sample. This new policy was implemented to guarantee that the most qualified teachers would fill available positions.

On Thursday, teachers met with the superintendent to discuss their future. After the meeting, Alison Deitch, a teacher for the school system, told the Providence Journal, “When they do rescind [the dismissal notices], from what I understand, there is no seniority. If you’ve been a teacher for 30 years, good luck.”

In spite of heated accusations of seniority-busting, Mayor Taveras maintains that their decision was not motivated by a desire to eliminate seniority-based hiring, and claims that they will let teachers know as soon as possible who will be able to keep their teaching jobs.

Providence Teacher Union President Steve Smith claimed that the mayor was “waging a war on workers, not a war to fix a budget or our schools.”

In an attempt to restore seniority rights to its constituents, the Providence Teachers Union has sued the district, but no settlement has been reached yet, leaving the teachers in this district with no guarantees regarding what is to come. And, just when you think that the situation could not get any bleaker for these folks, their union contract expires at the end of this year.

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Speak Up Against Senate Bill 5

February 20th, 2011

Have you contacted your representatives about Senate Bill 5 yet? Let me relay information to you directly from an attorney about what this bill would mean for education.

The firm of Muksovitz & Lemmerbrock, LLC, Attorneys at Law, sent a letter to the Cleveland Teachers Union on February 17, about SB5 after studying it in detail, and gave permission for this information to be shared with “anyone who cares about education, cares about children, and cares about teachers.” A copy of the original letter was sent to our union as well as, I’m sure, most unions throughout Ohio, and, since I believe that anyone who is reading my blogs, cares about education, children, and teachers, I am sharing the contents of this letter with you in the hopes that you will be outraged enough to do something about it, too.

Quoting from the letter directly:

“Senate Bill 5… moves forward with mandates that dictate how local school boards must operate in ways that are anti-teacher and anti-student. For example, the proposed legislation would do the following:

1. Tenure-SB5 eliminates all continuing contracts for new teachers and dictates that limited contracts may not be for more than one year. This provision will undermine the ability to attract the best and the brightest into the teaching profession.
2. Wages- It would be unlawful for school districts to base teachers’ salary on experience and education. Without any guidance whatsoever, the bill requires school districts to base salary solely on ‘merit.’
3. Health Insurance- It would be unlawful for school districts to negotiate the type of health care offered to employees, or the level of benefits available. It would be unlawful for a school district to charge employees less than 20 percent of the total premium for health care, although they could charge more.
4. Layoffs- It would be unlawful for school districts to base layoffs of teachers on seniority, within certification-which is the current method. Instead, school districts would be mandated to base layoffs on the ‘quality of performance’ of the teachers. This ‘quality of performance’ would be determined solely by the school district by considering the level of license the teacher holds, whether the teacher is ‘highly qualified,’ the value-added measure the school board uses to determine the performance of students assigned to the teacher’s classroom, the results of the teacher’s evaluation, and ‘any other criteria established by the board.’
5. Class Size- It would be unlawful for the school district to negotiate class size, or the number of teachers required in any category, such as the ratio of special education students assigned to special education teachers or to regular education teachers.
6. Leave Provisions- It would be unlawful for school districts to negotiate sick leave, maternity leave, injury leave, or assault leave provisions. These provisions must be set unilaterally by the school district and adopted as board policy.

As I stated earlier, SB5…makes the relationship between teachers and their school district worse than ever before. It mandates unilateral control over teachers and classrooms without any checks and balances in place. It outlaws collaboration. It is not designed to help children. It is designed to demonize teachers and destroy public education.” The letter is signed by Susannah Muskovitz.

Sobering news, but not surprising in the current atmosphere in which education’s woes are dumped on the doorstep of the public education system. This government will not be content until public education is a thing of the past, and they can get on with the business of treating education like a privatized business. And if we don’t raise our voices high and in huge numbers, that is exactly what will happen, and SB5 is just the tip of the iceberg.

Stand up! Speak up! Call and write your local representatives. Send the message that Senate Bill 5 is unacceptable! If there was ever a time to come together as educators in this country, it is now!

Teacher-World's Blog , ,

Just Got to Spew!

January 26th, 2011

I am probably going to make some parents angry with this blog, but I feel the need to spew, so here goes!

Today was a challenging day, and it began with a parent’s phone message regarding her child and the mean things other students are doing to him. In the message, she announced that, yet again, she went directly to our principal by emailing her about the current complaint. Now, let me give you a little background information which will make it clear to you why this sets me off.

This is a parent who we receive regular phone calls, letters, or emails from regarding her son and these vague accusations regarding how mean our students are to him. Upon occasion, we have followed up on minor disagreements he has had with other students, but they have been minor, and he is often guilty of the same behavior he is quick to fault others for.

There are three adults in our co-teaching classroom most of the day. We have never witnessed any of the more horrendous actions described by her son to his mother. In fact, we have discovered through our investigations of these reported incidents that most of the time, the events that have been described to her have been flat out untrue, and her son has admitted as much to us. When she has been told that he is not being honest about what is going on, she continues to believe him and complain about our unwillingness to deal with the students she claims are involved. Usually, her disbelief is followed with a threat to “take it higher”.

What her son has learned is that he can get drama going if he goes home and tells his mother things that have happened in school, real or otherwise, and he has learned to love that drama. He rarely tells us about his issues with other students before he goes home, which would give us the opportunity to deal with them if they are true. He would rather run home and get his mother postal so that she goes off on his teachers and his principal.

I have given you this background information regarding my day to explain why I feel the need to spew tonight. In fact, I was going to blog about something else tonight, but I felt compelled to write this blog specifically to parents. So, I’m sorry if I make you mad, but here goes!

Listen to your children when they come home with their school stories with love but with a bit of skepticism, because kids have a way of telling these stories from their own perspective, often leaving valuable pieces of the story out, especially if those pieces might incriminate themselves. Question them carefully and rationally refraining from judging the situation until you are able to gather more information, and let them know that you will be in touch with their teacher but in a POSITIVE way to try to find out all of the facts. When you contact the teacher, do it in a way that is open to the whole story, understanding that your child is human and maybe left out some of the best parts. Give the teacher the benefit of the doubt and handle the situation with respect. Finally, NEVER go to the principal before trying to work out the problem directly with the teacher. Only resort to that option if your concerns are not met.

Thank you for letting me unload. It was good therapy for me, and I needed that!

Teacher-World's Blog , ,

Lesson Learned?

December 23rd, 2010

Okay, so how many of you out there have a fellow teacher who constantly interrupts your lessons over the most inconsequential things? Annoying isn’t it? Not to mention disruptive for students who need to stay focused. Let me tell you about ours…

We have a very sweet woman who teaches in the classroom next to ours. She is helpful and kind, willing to share her resources, and an all-around good person. But she is not very organized and admittedly does not plan ahead as she should, so she often comes into other teachers’ rooms to find out what they are teaching and to see if she might borrow what is being utilized in that classroom. Now, since we are in an adjoining room this year, we get a higher percentage of the drop-in visits, and I must admit that while I truly care for her as a person, it becomes rather annoying to deal with these interruptions on a regular basis.

A couple of weeks ago, we were in the middle of a math lesson on probability which was going really well. We had our students’ attention, and they seemed to be grasping the concept we were teaching, until…Yes, you guessed it; another surprise drop-in from “The Visitor”, who promptly asked from the back of the room what we were teaching. We briefly explained that we were teaching a lesson on probability and then, in an effort to keep our students engaged I innocently (ha-ha) asked, “Students, what is the probability that Mrs. (name has been left out to protect her identity) will be back in our room tomorrow?” They all responded, “Very likely!” I then asked, “What is the probability that she will never come into our room again?” And, like good little mathematicians, they all piped up, “Impossible!”

Oh, what a beautiful thing when lessons learned have the additional benefit of teaching others a good lesson!

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Parents to Blame for Education’s Woes?

December 22nd, 2010

Finally, here is some really good news for teachers from an Associated Press-Stanford University Poll on education. At a time when teachers are accustomed to being blamed for all that is wrong with education from poor graduation rates to low test scores, this new survey finally points to something those of us in education have tried to say for a long time. According to this survey, 68 percent of adults believe that parents are more to blame for what ails the U.S. education system than teachers, school administrators, or teachers unions. Are people starting to see what is so obvious to those of us in education? It’s about time!

This AP-Stanford Poll in education was conducted by interviews on landline and cellular phones in September with 1,001 adults nationwide. The problems children and parents face tend to be growing and these problems are affecting school performance. For example:

* Many children are hungry, and several studies have linked poor nutrition to problems with concentration, lower standardized test scores, and more absentee issues.
* Many children need help with their homework but their parents are working so hard to make ends meet that they have no time to help with homework.
* Some children face violence at home making it hard to concentrate in school.
* Children under two who have been exposed to too much television seem to take longer to develop language skills according to researchers at the University of Washington.
* According to Attendance Counts, an advocacy group, attendance is a huge issue: One in ten kindergarten and first-grade students miss a month of school every year. This can put them behind other students for years. Additionally they report that by ninth grade, missing 20 percent of school is a better predictor of student dropout rate than test scores.

Do any of these studies surprise those of us in education? Those of us who are considered veteran teachers have witnessed these changes first-hand and the effect they have had on the educational process. But it is heartening to see that parents are beginning to see the connection between society’s struggles and the struggles we face educating our children as a result.

Other heartening news from this survey? Three-fourths of those polled said that the education provided in their local schools was excellent or good, and 55 percent feel that their children are receiving a better education than they received. Additionally, most felt that their children’s school is effectively preparing students for college or for the work force.

I, for one, am encouraged to see surveys like this. This is the kind of message that needs to be told to a nation that is so quick to criticize and blame teachers for the problems in education. The most serious problems we face in education today can be traced back to our societal issues. How about we turn those around instead of the schools?

Changes in Teaching, Teacher-World's Blog , ,

The Santa Claus Issue

December 19th, 2010

I would like you teachers to consider the following dilemma: how involved are you willing to get at this time of year in whether your students believe in Santa Claus or not? Let me share a true story that causes me to pose this question to you today.

I have a student in my fifth-grade class who, according to her mother, still believes in Santa Claus. Now, by fifth grade, most students have abandoned their earlier beliefs about the existence of Santa Claus. It is a rarity to find a student at this grade level who still believes in the guy in the red coat and pants, with the full white beard, and the sleigh full of presents. Most of them have come to the conclusion by the time they hit my grade that Santa is really their parents, and as long as the presents keep coming in every year, they are okay with that. But, at this time of year, it is often a focus of conversation and conjecture amongst students.

So, imagine my surprise when I received a phone call from a parent whose daughter came home from school very upset due to another student in my classroom asking her if she believed and indicating that he did not. Okay, now I know this is a difficult time for parents because most of us love creating that magic for our children and enjoy their excitement almost as much as they do. I’m not sure who is most upset when our child’s innocent beliefs are shattered, but for this mom, it was pretty clear she could not cope with this situation and was pretty panicked over how it would change Christmas if her daughter stopped believing.

So, what were her demands, because they most certainly were stated as such? First, she wanted me to talk to the student who had laid the groundwork for doubt in her daughter’s eyes. Second, she strongly suggested that I sit down with her daughter and reassure her that there was a Santa. I must confess that this was a first for me. In all my years of teaching, I have never been asked to intervene in a Santa-Claus-loss-of-faith moment, and I was very unwilling to do so now. I had no problem speaking calmly to the student who opened this conversation and reinforce the need to keep our opinions to ourselves when we are talking to someone who still believes. But, I am not this girl’s parent, and I refuse to be forced into a position that should clearly be handled by a parent. So, I talked to the other student, but I ignored the outrageous request to parent this woman’s child.

Teachers are being forced more and more to take on parental roles with their students, and I have done so often when that role is not being filled at home. But I draw the line when it comes to pushing Santa Claus on fifth-graders. Forgive me, Santa, but this is just not my job!

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